Marriage ball game

My Mom always encouraged me to be an “independent woman”.  I look back at how she used to tell me this and I can now understand her advice.  She works hard at work and she works her ass off at home.  My Dad basically sits around aside from doing a few things such as car maintenance, getting the car washed, mowing the lawn, shovelling, taking the garbage out and moving heavy things around.  When we were younger, he would play with us while my Mom would cook, do the dishes and do the laundry.  To me, my Dad did not contribute enough.  My Mom worked non-stop every day and night where as my Dad had tasks that allowed plenty of breaks.  No wonder my Mom advised me to stay single.

Now I’m the one married with a family.  I too have followed in my Mom’s footsteps and I work hard at work, stick to my schedule to plan meals, cook, clean, feed my daughter, etc.  It’s a thankless job really.  I think about how life would be so much easier if I didn’t feel like I had to manage my husband and tell him to help me with chores.  I would immediately alleviate myself from the stress of having to manage someone else.  Strike 1 – Needs to be managed, creates work for wife.

Life as a single woman, in my ideal world, would be headaches-free.  While discussing what to get my Dad for his birthday, my husband tosses his hands up in the air and gives up.  And when I talked to my brother, I tried to suggest that he go on a vacation with Dad (Dad is retired).  Brother said he is using up all his vacation days for his study trip to China.  So what can I do?  I can’t go because my husband doesn’t want to go on a trip with my parents.  Strike 2 – instead of helping in relieving issues, creates an obstacle to a solution.

What will instigate strike 3?

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